As I lay here and reflect on the year we've had,
I'm really hoping you'd think there was more good than bad,
insecurities have clouded my judgment at times,
I was only going by what you told me is what you didn't realize,
when you were in you'd told me, you'd never talk to her again in life,
then you come and text her that you'll love her for the rest of your life,
I don't know how you'd expect me to feel,
now all of sudden you guys are friends seems so unreal,
you said a lot of things to me,
seems like some of those things are but a memory,
If I had known that she could never be out of your heart
I don't think I would have open up my heart from the start,
Im not perfect, you have a lot of doubts not so much trust for me,
I also have those doubts like what does he really want from me,
every time I used to come see you I was always glowing,
the days never mattered because my love was growing,
now theres no intimacy no one seducing me,
I feel like Im drowning again and you'd rather be away from me,
numbing the heartache and rejection its easy,
despite all of that you don't really see me,
I often tell myself to just let you be,
But I just can't help myself I just want you to want me,
all of me even sexually,
your actions come off as cold,
I feel that shit right down to my soul,
sometimes I don't know who to talk to I'm crying inside,
talking to your family and everything was so far from my mind,
yes that was a mistake on my part,
I feel like no matter how hard I try things are falling apart,
all the dreams that I used to dream never had this version at the end
Now all the dreams I have don't seem to have an end!!

I’m still here

I know you love what you do,

I could never think to change you,

I fell in love before knowing you,

But now I know the real you,

Regardless my words never change up,

My heart my love hasn’t switched up,

My soul sees more to you, I guess I’m caught up,

I been told you I was gonna hold you down,

I’m sure I haven’t let you down,

I’m in love with you why I’m still around,

Don’t break my heart don’t fuck around,

I love spending time with you,

Shit 3 days without seeing you,

Ima miss the fuck outta you,

Absence makes the heart grow,

Making loves gonna be a show,

Make my body want you more when you gotta go, 

I know we’re both caught up in this crazy world, I’ve still let you into my world, you claiming me as your girl!! As long as we in this together, and your feelings is true, I’ll ride this wave as long as you want me too!!

As I lay here and see how far we’ve come,

I wonder do we have what it takes to remain as one,

I feel so strongly for you,

I’m not recognizing this love that’s true,

I know it’s cliche to say I’ve never felt this before,

Loving someone beyond intimacy it’s never happened before,

I don’t have your touch to soothe my soul,

My thoughts running wild out of control,

Your words warm my heart,

Even if at the moment we’re apart,

Uncertain of our chemistry,

But our connection ignites something in me,

Im a strong believer i have faith,

All I can do right now is wait,

I carry you in my heart I’m never alone,

Although I’m constantly waiting by the phone, just 

waiting for you Tryone💜

Our first valentine

Although you’re not here with me,

I know it’s only temporary,

I know we’re just waiting on time,

I already consider you to be mine,

You keep that same energy when you get out,

I’m really gonna show you what my loves all about,

You’re the kind of weakness hiding under my skin,

My love is burning for you from deep within,

I’ve fallen in love with your soul,

Making you happy is my only goal,

I could better show you what I’m trying to say,

For now happy first Valentine’s Day!!